someday i'll be a little less stressed out. someday i'll be able to focus enough to write here regularly again. and someday, someday i'll bake macaroons.


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this too shall pass

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tomorrow is friday. and then its the weekend. i'm going to bake a cake, eat tacos, pack some happy mail and make some yoyos. i'm going to sleep and sleep and sleep. and then i'm going to sleep some more. there will be movies and friends and soup. and maybe, just maybe, some writing here. it will be good.

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S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y night!

Star spangled sparkle 

  saturday night special tonight: 20% off everything! see shop announcement for details!

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checking items off my list


i checked off two items this past week. i've made big progress with this year's list.

 #9 - successfully make a layer cake. from scratch. without it falling. i can bake many, many things. a basic layer cake has eluded me for years. so, check.

#33 - take a leap. i'm taking two. so there.

i gave notice at my job. i started my job when i was 24. i was about to get
married and i had little or no idea what i wanted to be when i grew up. after
what seems like no time at all, i was given more responsibility, and eventually
a fancy title: executive director. it seemed, for a good long time, that i had
just happened into what i was going to be when i grew up and for a long time it
was good. stressful but good. rewarding in enormous ways, crazy-making in some.

along the way, the scales shifted. i think it wasn't just at work - i think the
world's collective blood pressure went through the roof as the economy tanked.
people were having a hard time and the ground was shaking underneath all of our

things has always helped me cope. sewing, knitting, cutting, gluing... and
baking. after grandma died i found myself baking as therapy. the smells, the
clear cut directions, the joy of feeding people - it all helped heal my
heartbreak and as things became more and more stressful at work, i baked more.
challenging myself to try new things or to bake without the aid of a recipe.
and you know what? i’m good at it.

when thinking about my future, it was becoming more and more obvious to me what
my future should be. and so a little more than 10 years after i started my job,
my job that i have really, truly LOVED, i’m moving on. i’m researching school
options, hoping that some friends who are bakers and who have been so
encouraging will not mind me hanging around in their kitchens, and figuring out
what this all means.

there will still be yoyos and rings – in case you’re wondering.

second leap is actually the more difficult one to wrap my head around.

we’ve known that our winter days in chicago were numbered. the cold makes us
both miserable. also, we’ve both lived here almost our entire lives. so, a
change of scenery and climate were imminent. but we’d sworn it was going to be
new orleans. and then we went back to austin to visit friends last spring and we
thought we were home again. we also toyed with the idea of california after visiting there last summer.
what we realized was that the world was our oyster. we can go anywhere.

when we
went to portland in january, we fell in love with the place. also, we fell in
love with the life we want to build there with each other. so, portland. hmmm.
its still taking time for me to get used to that one but it sounds good right?
shawn & i are moving to portland in the fall.

i like
it. its different but i like it.


portland dreamers by shyama helin

(i owe a huge thank you to all my friends and family. i have been cranky, distant and just generally unpleasant while i was figuring all of this out. i'm equating what i've been going through with growing pains. so, i'm sorry if i was a bitch. and thanks for being awesome. also, i owe you a cookie. or a pie. or how about a layer cake?)

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once upon a time, i hated pink. i hated it because my mom loved it and loved me in it. i hated it because i only wore black. i hated it because i believed people when they said redheads shouldn't wear pink. now, i LOVE it. i wear it all the time. i think i look good in it and i convince other people that pink is their friend, too. i rejoice when i see pictures like these and i'm convinced pink is THE spring colour

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tuesday's color is green, my favorite color, primarily because it is the color of moss. i love moss in an unnatural way. there's a flower shop, my favorite flower shop. its dark and green and mossy and i'm pretty sure that its what the inside of my brain looks like. oh lordy, i love green. i would seriously wear green EVERY SINGLE DAY if i could. 

maybe with a little pink from time to time.


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as far as colors go, yellow is the tippity top of my happy making list. find more happy here.

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more spring colours here!


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nom nom


i baked these yesterday. i can't even tell you just how incredible they are. all the flavors were perfectly balanced. i didn't change the recipe and when i make them again, there's only one or two things i'll do differently. i used three floyds milk stout - and let me tell you, tasty. and yes, i had one for breakfast. 


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go ask alice

i know, i know. i seem to be in the minority here but i LOVED alice. i liked that alice was an adult. i liked that it was kind of dark. and i loved looking at it. it was lacking in some areas but i was giddy with ideas after watching it. the costumes, oh the costumes. and the giant toadstools. and the enormous fiddleheads. oh, i loved it so. 


and i think i'm finally going to make myself this skirt, which i've been obsessed with for months since i first saw this photo. i even already have the gazillion yards of ric rac, waiting to be hand dyed.



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