i checked off two items this past week. i've made big progress with this year's list.
#9 - successfully make a layer cake. from scratch. without it falling. i can bake many, many things. a basic layer cake has eluded me for years. so, check.
#33 - take a leap. i'm taking two. so there.
i gave notice at my job. i started my job when i was 24. i was about to get
married and i had little or no idea what i wanted to be when i grew up. after
what seems like no time at all, i was given more responsibility, and eventually
a fancy title: executive director. it seemed, for a good long time, that i had
just happened into what i was going to be when i grew up and for a long time it
was good. stressful but good. rewarding in enormous ways, crazy-making in some.
along the way, the scales shifted. i think it wasn't just at work - i think the
world's collective blood pressure went through the roof as the economy tanked.
people were having a hard time and the ground was shaking underneath all of our
things has always helped me cope. sewing, knitting, cutting, gluing... and
baking. after grandma died i found myself baking as therapy. the smells, the
clear cut directions, the joy of feeding people - it all helped heal my
heartbreak and as things became more and more stressful at work, i baked more.
challenging myself to try new things or to bake without the aid of a recipe.
and you know what? i’m good at it.
when thinking about my future, it was becoming more and more obvious to me what
my future should be. and so a little more than 10 years after i started my job,
my job that i have really, truly LOVED, i’m moving on. i’m researching school
options, hoping that some friends who are bakers and who have been so
encouraging will not mind me hanging around in their kitchens, and figuring out
what this all means.
there will still be yoyos and rings – in case you’re wondering.
second leap is actually the more difficult one to wrap my head around.
we’ve known that our winter days in chicago were numbered. the cold makes us
both miserable. also, we’ve both lived here almost our entire lives. so, a
change of scenery and climate were imminent. but we’d sworn it was going to be
new orleans. and then we went back to austin to visit friends last spring and we
thought we were home again. we also toyed with the idea of california after visiting there last summer.
what we realized was that the world was our oyster. we can go anywhere.
went to portland in january, we fell in love with the place. also, we fell in
love with the life we want to build there with each other. so, portland. hmmm.
its still taking time for me to get used to that one but it sounds good right?
shawn & i are moving to portland in the fall.
it. its different but i like it.
portland dreamers by shyama helin
(i owe a huge thank you to all my friends and family. i have been cranky, distant and just generally unpleasant while i was figuring all of this out. i'm equating what i've been going through with growing pains. so, i'm sorry if i was a bitch. and thanks for being awesome. also, i owe you a cookie. or a pie. or how about a layer cake?)