her blog

sometimes the internet can be annoying. if you're having a bad day, feeling not so great about yourself or frustrated with the way business is going, the internet can be your worst enemy. a trip to the blog reader on a pms-y day could wreck you. i've been there - wishing i had more fabulous clothes, all found thrifting, of course; wishing i had time to do ALL THE THINGS. it can feel really isolating sometimes when all everyone is sharing is the good stuff, the successes. does no one get pimples in the blogging world? or have a week (or two) with no sales in their shops? or forget to do their dishes? 

of course they do but they aren't talking about it. we don't see what's just outside the frame of the photo or what things look like pre-photoshop. 

then jenny over at frecklewonder posted this. it was a breath of fresh air that prompted me to continue the ongoing project of cleaning out my blog reader. i unfollowed people on twitter and unfriended some people on facebook. it wasn't easy but within a day i was feeling less distracted and well, better. 

i also had an email exchange about some of these issues. i realized that there's so much talk about manifesting success that i think there might be a fear of manifesting negative thoughts. we just sweep them under the rug.

and then this popped up in my blog reader. 

so, in the spirit of the epidemic of truthiness that seems to be spreading...

• my house is a MESS. we're preparing for two shows in the next few weeks and there are supplies everywhere.
• and laundry baskets. i need to fold laundry desperately but its entirely possible that i won't and that those baskets will just be emptied as we wear the clothes. 
• i've debated including this item a bunch. i've got my period and i'm trying a diva cup for the first time. its WEIRD. no further details, just weird.
• i am having a really slow week on etsy and its making me twitchy.
• i've watched more than one lifetime movie this week while working. yeah, i know. 
• i have been unable to remember that i have a hair appointment tomorrow while trying to make other plans for friday repeatedly. you'd think the two inch roots would serve as a helpful reminder but no. i am a fucking space case this week.
• when i'm stressed i swear. A LOT.
• in happy news, after months of frustration with my skin, i went back to using proactiv. i've used it before and it works fabulous until it just stops working. right now though my skin is looking pretty fucking great - for me at least. that's all i can ask for.

also, no pretty picture today. because there is nowhere in my house that isn't cluttered with piles of books, work in progress or dirty glasses and clearing a surface to take a picture or just posting a picture of flowers or something seems like bullshit. so, i'm not doing it. 

for the week of april 29 - may 5:

• exercise - yoga or otherwise: 2 (shit.)
• walks with monkey or bike rides (yeah, yeah. this is exercise. but its fun and doesn't count as exercise in my head.): 0 (shit again.)
• number of smoothies: 3
• number of glasses of green juice: 5
• meals involving pizza: 0 (but i thought about pizza. a lot.)
• meals involving piles of vegetables: 6
• i cooked: 4 times
• letters written: 1
• packages sent: 11
• things made: 40 necklaces, 8 bracelets, 36 barrettes (craft show prep continues)
• photos taken and edited: 212
• best thing i watched: tv - it was NOT he died with a felafel in his hand, as predicted. it was good, meh in parts and hilarious in others. anyway, i went to see cabin in the woods again, which i'd been dying to do. my thirst for more joss whedon and fran kranz was great so, i started to rewatch dollhouse. i sort of hated it the first time. i'm definitely into it now. also, cabin in the woods is still awesome - in case you were wondering.
• books read: let's pretend this never happened by jenny lawson. fucking hilarious and exactly what i needed this week. like, tears streaming down your face funny. like, having to read it out loud to shawn because he's jealous of my laughter funny. i love it.
• days i wore socks: 1
• days i wore no socks: 6
• living room (and kitchen) dance parties: 1  

1. maurice sendak. in this interview, he said he was in love with the world. i think the world was in love with him. i know i was. if you haven't seen tell them anything you want, do. be prepared for tears.
2. joss whedon. when we saw pheonix at lollapalooza a few years ago, i was thrilled for them. they said it was the biggest show they'd ever played and you could tell that they were really excited to be there. they were having so much fun. when we went to see the avengers sunday night, i felt the same way for joss whedon. yes, cabin in the woods was awesome and may be in my top ten favorite movies now but the avengers was SO BIG and SO FUN. he got to work with all the people and play with all the things. its clear he had fun doing it. 
3. planning adventures. kateri's move to portland is around the corner. we've been talking about the adventures we'll take since before i left chicago - places like thor's well and the sea lion caves. first up though, the redwoods. i can't wait. (in truth, there's a long list of places i haven't been to in portland yet that i'm saving for when she gets here.) 
4. my old job. i've been thinking a lot about my almost eleven years at the synagogue. maybe because its been two year since i left and my brain is finally letting the walls i'd built collapse but i'm remembering things, good things. working for god may be hard but i did learn a lot - about myself, human nature and yes, god. maybe its finally time to start writing about it.
5. my parents. tomorrow is my mom and dad's 31st anniversary. impressive, isn't it?
6. hats. there are big ideas brewing for new hats. i think that will be at the top of my list for when we return from bazaar bizarre at the end of may.
7. these shoes. they're kind of wacky but i love them. plus, i feel like they'd go with everything in my closet. although, these are the shoes i'm saving myself for.

i posted a few tweets yesterday that had my friends a bit concerned about my stress level. here's what was happening:

• the house was (and is) still in chaos, as you can see.
• i'd called shawn an asshole as he was leaving for a meeting. i was laughing while i said it and i don't really think he's an asshole. it was the stress talking.
• my printer decided to be all temperamental when i sat down to print tags and cards for the shows. tagging, carding and pricing is kind of, you know, important for craft shows.
• i needed to work on my display but shawn needed to finish up something for it and i hadn't realized it wasn't done.
• i needed to make pixelparty earrings but found we had no jump rings. i'm not even sure how that happened.
• the smoke detector fell on my big toe. i could explain how that happened but it still wouldn't make any sense.

i had a list. there was nothing on it i could accomplish at that moment and things were falling on me. nothing disastrous but my day had been planned out pretty much to the minute. there was no wiggle room. and there i was, stuck waiting for shawn to come home until i could make any progress on the list. so i tidied a bit. i finally folded the laundry. i did the few things i could. then i made a skirt. because, well, why not? i had the fabric washed and ready to go. i had a zipper and bias tape. i had the time while i waited. from start to finish it took me just over an hour. everything went smoothly, including the zipper installation. let me tell you, the successful installation of a zipper is a magical thing. once it was finished, i felt almost instantly better. that is, until i had to get back work on the real list again.

sleep is overrated. a-line skirts with viewmasters printed on them? completely awesome.

this weekend:

• there was sunshine. lots and lots of sunshine.
• so much sunshine that crafty wonderland was slow. SO. SLOW.
• crafty wonderland was still totally fun though. i can't really wrap my head around how many womderful people we've met in the year and a half we've been here. crafty people are the best.
• also fun? hanging out with donovan.
• we saw waterfalls, mountains, drank some beer and cocktails, visited a photobooth, ate donuts, browsed powell's, played some videogames and pinball. we also had a really nice time at donovan's pen pal meetup. 
• at the pen pal meetup, i met jennifer. she's one of donovan's totally delightful pen pals and we've all decided to be friends. 

and it was good.