music monday

Posted in:
  |   permalink   |   0 comment(s)

word of the week

umbrella. a device consisting of a circular canopy of cloth on a folding metal frame supported by a central rod, used as protection against rain or sometimes sun; a protecting force or influence.

check out all the words i've stitched so far here.

Posted in:
  |   permalink   |   0 comment(s)

a very old man with a very big mouth

there was this old man at the synagogue, a totally inappropriate asshole. most of the time i knew he was like that with everyone but more than once he really pissed me off. he pissed just about everyone off more than once. the rabbi would say he was a pussycat. he swore like a truck driver in the synagogue. he was always rude to shawn but he'd quietly tell me later that he hoped shawn knew he was kidding; that he was a good guy. he once told me to go interview for a job at another synagogue and use the inevitable offer as leverage for a higher salary. he was a total pain in the ass and i totally dug him, most of the time. he passed away this week. right now, i'm hoping for an afterlife. he and his wife were adorable and i like to think they're together again. 

Posted in:
  |   permalink   |   0 comment(s)

read. reread.

i read donna tartt's first book, the secret history, in high school. i remember staying up all night on a school night reading and read the whole thing. two days later, after i slept a little, i reread it. i've reread it many times. i love that book and many people i love love that book. everyone i worked with at borders loved that book. i remember joking with co-workers that you couldn't get hired without having read it. 

despite my love, i haven't reread it in years. i wonder. were my late teens and early twenties the perfect time for me to read it? would it be the same almost 20 years later? i think i've decided i need to know. i'll be finding my copy and putting in on my nightstand. i'll reread it after i reread her new book, the goldfinch, which i just finished this morning and know i need to reread immediately.

i knew nothing about the book when i started it. i knew it was donna tartt and that people i love loved it. that, was awesome. i went into it blind, had no expectations and loved every single word. i gasped out loud multiple times. the first time all i could think of was this:

i also knew that one friend said she took her time, she wanted to climb inside the book and never come out. another friend said it was intense and that she had to take breaks. a third friend says she'll sleep when she's dead. i tried to show some restraint. i read a hundred pages before bed for a couple of nights. last night, at the halfway point and climbing out of my skin, needing to know what happens, i decided i sleep every night, books like this come every decade. if i'm lucky. i may be a little sleepy today but i'm glad i did it. 

Posted in:
  |   permalink   |   0 comment(s)

word of the week

Posted in:
  |   permalink   |   0 comment(s)

music monday

Posted in:
  |   permalink   |   0 comment(s)

word of the week

brilliant. (of light or color) fully of light, very bright, shining and radiant; glorious, magnificent. superb, wonderful; exceptionally clever or talented; a diamond of this cut.

Posted in:
  |   permalink   |   0 comment(s)

word of the week

croissant. a crescent-shaped roll of rich, flaky pastry; perfection.

Posted in:
  |   permalink   |   0 comment(s)

dear blog,

i could tell you how sorry i am for neglecting you so... but i'm not. 

i've been writing. i've got nine chapters of book 3 done. i'm a long way from being finished but i'm getting somewhere.

i've been making stuff every single day. like i do. yoyos, you ask? a few of those, yes, for custom orders, and they've been awesome. but i decided right after january 1 to take a break from making yoyos except for custom orders. i marked everything way down in the shop and i gotta tell you, it was a good decision. i'm not entirely sure it was showing in my work but i was getting bored. so bored. and you know, i think my regular customers were too. bummer. but, i've gotten a couple of wedding orders and there's a few more in the works and they've all been really fun. i'm actually starting to think about a small "collection" for the late spring. we'll see. right now, i'm making whatever occurs to me or has been on my list forever. some skirts out of fabric from my stash, some embroidered pieces for friends, some for the shop, some just to see if i can. like this:

last weekend, shawn went skiing. i had planned to spend a lot of time laying around, reading and writing. but no, i was searching my pins and likes on pinterest for something specific i'd pinned ages ago, a hat pattern that i thought i might finally make. i never found it but i did see a whole lot of inspiring embroidery. so much i ended up making a board for it. i looked at kick ass thing after kick ass thing and realized, i love everything i'm embroidering right now but i needed a mother fucking challenge. i needed to make something amazing. then the idea struck like lightning. within an hour, i'd printed a picture from my instagram photos and was starting to sketch some of the basic lines of my face onto linen. i stared at it a long time before i started to stitch. i wasn't really sure i could do it. 

oh, blog, here's where i should also interject that this winter has been rough on my psyche. i've been sad. not constantly but a real lot. i've been plagued by creeping self doubt. with no good reason. although, depression doesn't need a reason, just a place to hide.

so, i wasn't really sure i could do it. even though i've been embroidering forever, i was certain i couldn't do it. but i told that voice in my head to shut the fuck up and went full steam ahead. i started stitching friday night and had to stop when i realized i didn't have the right floss to do my hair. saturday morning, i woke up bright and early and went to joann's where i got the side eye for holding skein after skein of rust colored embroidery floss to my hair. i brought my purchase home and got back to work. after hours and hours, hours i barely noticed passing, i was done. and you know, it is amazing. 

more amazing? by the end of the weekend, i felt like myself again. today, i feel great. the sun is shining. i've got a lunch date. i'm going to do some writing and some stitching and its all going be good. because life is good, no matter what bullshit my brain goblins were trying to tell me. 

so, blog, i've been neglectful but i really needed to just take care of myself. i can't apologize for that. 

love, 

me

Posted in:
  |   permalink   |   0 comment(s)